Listening To Your Anxiety Messages
Listening to your anxiety, that little voice inside your head can wreck havoc with your peace of mind, as well as your behavior. You may be making lifestyle decisions based on the discussion in your head. Most, if not all, of these messages you’re hearing in your head have been planted there by something, whether external or internal. Either way, you have to be able to sort through those messages to get to what’s real versus what’s perceived. Let’s take a look at some common messages that often go hand-in-hand with anxiety.
I WILL NEVER OVERCOME THIS FEAR
Fear is a major stressor in most of those individuals who have mild to severe anxiety. Many people battling anxiety can be paralyzed at the thought of trying to overcome a fearful situation or thought. The solution? Take one small step forward. This is nothing elaborate, just taking one small step, making one small change, that might alleviate at least a portion of the fear. I for instance have a fear of heights. I constantly have to challenge my thinking and that little voice, and tell it that I can go up high, or over a bridge that is high. It is not comfortable but I do it. Each time I challenge myself the fear gets smaller.
I KNOW THINGS WILL GET WORSE:
You see a situation as being bad, and the more you think about it, the more you believe things will get worse. This begins a spiral of heightened anxiety. The solution? Go ahead and imagine the worse. Don’t hold back. Voice it out loud. As you put the worse case scenario into words, you begin to release your worry, and your anxiety starts to lessen. I have even done this! It really lessens the fear. I have allowed myself to imagine what I think is the worst thing…everyone has something they think they could never overcome. Let your mind go there and ask what would you do? Once you see that you could make choice and manage, the fear pops like a pinprick in a balloon.
I AM GOING CRAZY:
When you have a multitude of thoughts racing around in your head, it can feel overwhelming, out of control. Things start to become a blur of confusion, chaos ensues, and that’s when your anxiety skyrockets. The solution? Stop the madness! Literally. Put a stop to everything you are doing – everything. One coping technique I have used is to draw an actual stop sign in my mind and really visualize it. It stops my thoughts in their track and redirects my thinking. Give yourself a break – for a minute, for an hour, or even a day. When you are ready, come back into your world with the realization that you are not, in fact, going crazy. Your brain was just spinning like a hamster wheel and you had to stop it and get off. Now, focus on doing one thing at a time. I often put on spa music or new age music and let my mind calm down.
I KNOW SOMETHING BAD IS GOING TO HAPPEN:
Worrying about what bad thing is going to happen next is not uncommon. Being certain that bad things are around every corner can be anxiety. No matter how much you play something out in your mind, you won’t be able to predict the future. Why? Because you don’t have complete control over all the factors that make up any event. The solution? Plan ahead for the things you do have control over – your words, your reactions, your actions. That’s the proper way to handle any situation as it unfolds. Of course bad things happen to everyone at some time. We all live through bad times. If you are paralyzed by the thought of bad things happening, anxiety may be at the root.
I NEED TO BE WORRYING ABOUT THIS:
Worry is something we all do to some degree. But, when worry consumes you and limits your normal activities, this is the foundation of anxiety. For some, much of their anxiety is self-imposed, caused by finding things to worry about, as if it were their mission in life. The solution? Write out a list of worries that cause you anxiety. Then rank each worry in order of severity. Now take any worry off your list that you have absolutely no control over. You should now be looking at a list of things that you can learn how to handle in such a way as to not cause anxiety.
I HAVE NO CONTROL:
In reality, you are neither totally without control or totally in control of any situation. Feeling that you have no control may cause anxiety. The solution? Control what you can; your actions and your reactions. Take a situation, perhaps something that’s already happened, and decide what you could have controlled and what was outside of your control. Be realistic and don’t fill in the event with ghosts of conversations or actions that didn’t occur. Just think of what was in your power to control (again, your actions and reactions) and play out the scene with those items. Now you see how you might turn that event or a similar episode around to be something you can handle without becoming anxious.
I CAN NEVER OVERCOME THIS EVEN WITH HELP:
Helplessness is a serious contributor to anxiety. If you feel helpless, you’ll feel hopeless. That’s when the feeling of losing control can take over and you may become fearful. Again, the spiral leads downward into anxiety. The solution? If you fall into the trap of believing that nothing can help, educate yourself by researching, reading, and asking others for advice. Call on professional help and be honest. Explain that you believe your anxiety is helpless, and hopeless. That is what taking action is all about.
The conversation you are having with yourself is really a learning tool. What are you telling yourself about your limitations, conditions, weaknesses, and helplessness? When the phrases pop into your head, there is something going on that you need to put in perspective, talk through, and learn from. Follow these suggestions and see if you can put your mind to rest and send anxiety packing!
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tami barrington says
this was very informative for me. im working on dealing better with my anxiety.
Victoria W says
Thank you for this article. It’s been an interesting read. Having suffered with anxiety and depression for years I’m relieved to be in a good place right now but I do actually tell myself every day to stop, take a step back, breathe and it does help calm me
kelly light says
I have been having so much anxiety between caring for my mom, and my adult kids, my husband, it causes me chest pain and dealing with my pain anyway, well, this article was very helpful.
Ashleigh says
Very honest! It is important to listen to yourself. Taking a moment or even meditating can make a world of difference.
Donna Jacoby says
I’ve always had to do one thing at a time to curb the anxiety in a situation that I have no control over. Thank you for sharing!
loen210 says
Thanks for posting.
And may I say I love your photos! The dog with the “telephone” and the heart kiwi. Adds so much cheer to the words.
Minta Boggs says
Anxiety is scary and if you don’t keep it in control it can absolutely take over like weeds in your garden or poison ivy in your yard.. A lot of people struggle with anxiety and you have put a lot of good information in your post! I think sometimes people don’t understand that they are not alone in this struggle.
Kim says
Thank you for sharing information about a topic so many of us struggle with in private.
Randi C. says
Because of all the stress in our daily lives, we may be anxious and not even realize that it is happening; thanks for your suggestions and insights into handling anxiety which unfortunately has become such a big part of everyday life.
Darlene Wright says
Great Information! Thanks for sharing!
wen budro says
Great post….you nailed it. It’s helped me, to challenge that hamster wheel in my head, through meditation, mindfulness, and cognitive therapy.
lisa says
Those are good tips. I too have a fear of heights. My heart feels like it’s going to jump out of my chest when I walk or drive over a bridge.
veronica lee says
I meditate and pray when I’m stressed. That helps a lot.
slehan says
I like the ‘what’s the worst that can happen’. We often make our fears bigger than they need to be. I’ve managed to stop worrying about things I cannot change.
slehan at juno dot com
molli vandehey says
it is really hard to slow down when necessary with 4 kids, but i have been trying to care for myself more.
debbie campbell says
Thanks for the advice. I tend to get consumed by worry and let anxiety get the best of me. It is something I continue to work on.
pumpkinsfan76 says
Thank you for posting this. Sadly I have anxiety and sometimes it overcomes me.This is helpful.
Kristina Kohler says
I do not handle stress well, and I just need to take a breather and take one day at a time. I remove myself from anything that is causing me stress and take deep breaths and try to relax and think of something that is going good in my daily life.
Michelle L says
Thank you for the article.
Elizabeth Stacy says
I suffer from PTSD is not a fun thing I have been dealing with this now going three years. There days I don;t want get out of the house.
Dom says
Common problem
Dianna Davis says
Great post. A lot of people have stress and anxieties at many different levels. I for one go through them,occasionally , But not as badly as two or my three daughter. I find that if I unplug myself, meditate and some breathing tech. along with yoga– it really helps me. I also know this doesn’t work for everyone. I had to learn the hard way because I’m not very good with medication, that made be more of a zombie.
Natalie says
My anxiety has increased over the years. Especially when it comes to money!!
Linda Bradshaw says
I have been having a lot of anxiety here within the past 2 weeks. Today I actually took the morning off, unplugged from internet and relaxed. I am feeling better right now.
Barrie says
Breathing techniques help a lot with anxiety and letting go of what you can’t handle!
Michelle L says
Yes I agree with Laurie. Thank you
laurie damrose says
This is a great piece.I think a lot of us have some of these thoughts because of over busy life styles.
sklocinski says
Do one thing at a time. Slow down and stop multitasking. Doing one thing at a time will reduce stress and allow you to perform each task more efficiently.
Sara says
This blog very intresting to learn about